“I know you’re upset when you start throwing the dishes around in the sink” my husband said one day. And he was right. I wouldn’t actually say that I was upset, I would show him and hope that he caught on. It was like that with many things in our relationship. Many things were left unsaid and I secretly hoped he would read my mind and “get it.”
For most partnerships, there isn’t a compatibility issue, there is a clarity issue. SO many things that are unclear. Without clarity there is a lack of awareness. Whatever we are unaware of, we can not change.
Here are some things you need to be clear on in order to have a successful partnership:
- What are your goals? What are your partner’s goals?
- What are your deal breakers (must have’s in relationship)? (I hope that your and your partner’s deal breakers are the same!)
- What will you spend your money on?
- What is your purpose? Their purpose?
- What is the labor distribution in the house?
- What are your ideals and agreements around sex?
- How will you handle decision making? Conflict?
Relationships that are clear on these things KNOW that they are compatible. And with that clarity comes confidence, purpose and passion.
If you don’t have clarity, where do you start? You’ve got two options. You can go it alone, or you can get some coaching. Why get coaching? Because it takes less time and is less risky than trying to figure it our by yourself. And unless you’re having mental health issues, why reach for therapy when coaching can be more effective?*
If you desire more clarity in your relationship, I invite you to have a clarity session. Just click on my email address (firstname.lastname@example.org) and in the subject line put “clarity session” and we’ll give you the details!
Great relationships make life worth living!
*Findings based my findings as an occupational therapist, having over 2 decades of personal experience serving therapists as clients, and clients who have had years of therapy.